Third Wheel


Dear Flame Dame,

My girlfriend and I have always been monogamous. We have been together for 3 years and have a great relationship. Recently at a party we were both attracted to the same girl and just talking about her later brought on the hottest sex either of us had ever had. We discussed having a threesome and the idea is a huge turn on for us, however I'm a bit stressed out about this. I have this crazy feeling that she will be thinking about this other girl instead of me after we play around. I think I still want to do it because I think it would be amazingly hot to see my girlfriend with another woman. But how do I get over my inhibitions?

Leery Lezzy

Dear Leery Lezzy,

Monogamy is sometimes overrated. It can be a wild, wet, and crazy good time when you start to delve into group sex. But don't delude yourself into the idea that it is drama free all the time. Some couples venture into group sex to spice up a dying relationship, others have been doing it since the very beginning. Either way, where human sexuality is concerned, there can be drama.

The major hump (no pun intended) is seeing your partner being sexual with another person for the first time. It is common to experience feelings of jealousy or possessiveness. The key to being sure this single incident won't damage your relationship is communication. Talking the entire scenario out before it even happens.

Talking about your boundaries and rules. What is ok and what is absolutely not ok. There needs to be a crystal clear understanding of each others boundaries and rules and the knowledge that they will be respected. Without respect of your partners feelings, this can't happen. It will only crater your relationship.

"The lifestyle" as it is commonly referred pertains to anyone engaging in group sex or any swinger related sexual activity. You set your limits. Don't allow anyone (even your partner) to influence your decision on whether or not you are comfortable doing something.

There are multiple websites both locally and canada wide that can help you get in touch with sexual partners or other couples seeking the same thing you are. From no strings attached sex and play to polyamorous relationships. You can even find kinky people online for friendship or sex play. But you might just find your best hookups from the girls you meet at clubs or events.

In the end Leery, its all about having fun without jeopardizing you and your partners relationship. Talk everything out and keep the lines of communication open. Take care of each other.

Big Busty Hugs and a Bum Squeeze

The Flame Dame

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