The Answer Is Simple: A, B, C, D...


It's dark, it's gloomy, what a perfect weather to cheer you the fuck up! Well, not so much... In this kind of weather depression is possible and if someone is grumpy, well considering the weather, they are just having an awesome day. Aren't I a joy to be around? I can hear my partner yelling across the room - HELL NO!!!

So what can we do, well the answer is simple: a, b, c, d... or should I say the vitamin orgy.

Instead of boring you to death with an academic report on vitamins, which I am tempted to do, I will just give you a highlight of how these vitamins can benefit you and improve your sex life.

Vitamin A - Helps maintain good skin so you're bum-bum will be nice and smooth. Should I even mention foreskin? It improves night vision allowing you to better see your partners wee-wee or hoo-hoo, while doing the nasty. It also ensures proper functioning of your urinary tract helping with watersports, of course.

Vitamin B6 - It promotes the formation of red blood cells, which can be hot if you're into True Blood kinky type of lovemaking. Some say it also helps with insomnia, therefore after a one-night stand this is a perfect vitamin to help you say, "I'm tired, it's late, go home" and send them packing.

Vitamin B12 - It helps boost energy and speed up metabolism. I really don't know how this could help you in the bedroom unless you're into eating peanut butter out of your partner's naughty parts. Actually... I know people put vegetables in their private area - does metabolism play a role in that?

Vitamin C - My grandmother told me it helps fight the cold, but it also boosts your immune system which helps fight infections. However, when I say infections I don't mean STD's so wrap that monkey before you plow.

Vitamin D - This is the vitamin we get from the sun and which was the inspiration for this article. It helps with calcium absorption that is necessary for strong bones and your ability to do all those Kama Sutra acrobatic poses without the risk of fracturing a bone. It can also act as a happy pill making you a "joy to the world" just as I fucking am.

I will stop right here as there is probably enough info to interest you in more research about these vitamins. I know you probably think I am a doctor - well I am not... SHOCK - I know!!! I am no doctor, therefore not everything I wrote should you take seriously, but seriously, vitamins are good for your sex life, I mean, they are good for you, I mean... just go speak to your doctor!!!

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